Does the essay meet the purpose of creating a persuasive comparison & contrast argument?

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Learning Goal: I’m working on a english writing question and need an explanation and answer to help me learn.The Dream We Will Never RememberYour dreams are the source of a good 6-12 hours of your day, we might not track it or even remember what happens. During this time, you are in another world and can think about things you’ve done. Sometimes you’ll dream that you are accomplishing a childhood dream or even better marrying the love of your life. In Shakespeare’s play, “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” we follow four lovers on a task of love. Shakespeare’s shares many themes throughout the play, but Dreams is the most significant that match the 2014 filmed version as well.When we think of a world wind of an adventure, we always think about what will happen, but what everyone needs before going on an adventure is a good night’s sleep. In the 2014 version of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, it begins with showing Puck, Oberon’s Right Hand, going to sleep. This viewer to follow that the entire play is being treated as a dream. This contrast from the handwritten play from Shakespeare. In the beginning of the play, we are not greeted by puck, moreover we are directly set in Athens with Hippolyta and Theseus discussing their wedding. We are then going throughout the entire plot with the lovers finding one another, arguing about who loves who, and finally falling in love with each other. In the 2014 version of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, once Oberon orders Puck to place the eye drops into DEMETRIUS’s eyes he places a pillow under him to put him to sleep until he is found by Helena to be in love with her. Once Oberon finds out that he screwed up with the eye drops he orders him to go back and fix the issues in both the film and the play, “What hast thou done? Thou hast mistaken quite And laid the love juice on some true love’s sight” (Act 3,2,89-91). In the play Oberon expresses the same amount of anger and tells Puck to put the lovers to sleep and reverse his mistakes…..The character that made an “ass” of himself was the only one in the flim version to fully express what happened to him. Nick bottom was turned into an “ass” and was Titianias lover and ended up making love to her, but to his dismay he was turned back into a Human and returned back to the woods in which he was found. As dumbfounded as he was after he returned he believed it was all a dream, He questioned what happened to himself, “ I have had a most rare vision. I have had a dream—past the wit of man to day what dream it was. Man is but an ass if he go about and expound this dream”(Act 4,1, 190-193). Bottom begins to question if he was really dreaming in a small monologue portrayed in the 2014 play version which equally express how confused he was.For which character sets the story into a blaze was Puck who decided that he was the one who manipulate the lovers with the orders sent directly from his boss, Oberon. Once all the lovers have been told they are to be wed to one another by the power of Theseus and Hippolyta, it seems that their lives are seen as perfect. The lovers themselves also do believe they were under some trance where they were in a dream, “Are you sure That we are awake? It seems to me That, yet we sleep, we dream. Do not you think the duke was here, and bid us to follow him?” (Act 4, 1. 178-181). In the 2014 film version, there wasn’t emotion or confusion shown by the Demetrius and Lysander when they were returned to their lovers, it could have been more written on how they all were placed in the new direction. The story ends with our gentle Puck coming to us an bidding us goodbye. Him speaking in the play is talking directly to the reader showing us that this was all a dream, “…Everything will be all right—you were asleep when you saw these visions, and this silly pathetic story was no more real than a dream” (Act 5, 1, End). He is telling the readers that we were dreaming the entire time with the story of star croseed lovers.To wrap up my thoughts, the theme Dream was better represented in both the play and the 2014 version, which was a personal favorite, that express the importance of dreaming. The film version, portrayed Puck dreaming while the whole situation unfolded and finally waking up when everything comes down to a happy ending. The play itself, in a way, breaks the 4th wall talking directly to the reader and telling them hopefully they enjoyed the play and of you did not do not be angry with him.Revise Overall Meaning and StructureAre the subjects sufficiently alike for the comparison-contrast to be logical and meaningful?
Does the essay meet the purpose of creating a persuasive comparison & contrast argument?
What is the essay’s thesis? Does it take an arguable stance? Is it vague or specific? How could the thesis be stated more effectively?
Is the overall essay organized primarily by the subject-by-subject method or by the point-by-point method? What is the best strategy for this essay?
Are the same features discussed for each subject? Are they discussed in the same order?
Which points of comparison and/or contrast need further development? Which points should be deleted? Where do significant points seem to be missing? How has the most important similarity or difference been emphasized so far?
Revise Paragraph DevelopmentIf the essay uses the subject-by-subject method, which paragraph marks the switch from one subject to another? Is the transition from one subject to the next clear and effective? If not, how could it be improved?
If the essay uses the point-by-point method, do paragraphs consistently alternate between subjects? If this alternation becomes too elaborate or predictable, what could be done to eliminate the problem? Are the transitions effective? If not, how could they be improved?
Where would transitional words or phrases make it easier to see similarities and differences between the subjects being discussed?
Revise Sentences and WordsWhere do too many signal devices make sentences awkward and mechanical?
Which sentences and words fail to convey the intended tone?
Where are there inappropriate shifts in verb tense, sentence fragments, or run-on sentences?
Where are the subjects unclear?
Are the quotes given in Shakespeare’s original language?
Is the play & films’ title spelled correctly and properly formatted each time as A Midsummer Night’s Dream?
General RevisionDoes the essay address the chosen prompt? Are there areas this could be improved?
Are there any glaring or repeated errors in the grammar or mechanics of the essay?
Are quotations properly introduced and cited?
Does the essay use a variety of examples from the films and play text? If not, where and how could this be improved?
What were the biggest strengths of this draft?
Is there anything else you would like to say about the piece you are critiquing?

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