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Be certain to maintain an informative tone rather than arguing for change. The purpose is for you, the writer/speaker, to further sharpen your focus by understanding what the audience does and does not need to know.
For example, if a presentation is focused on a group of teens, the information, presentation style, etc., would be devised to appeal to that group. If that same presentation is focused on their parents, the information, presentation style, etc., would be quite different. The 3-point thesis needs to be further refined. Use one sentence. Again, the goal of sharpening this focus so specifically, is to streamline every part of your process.
Zoos cause animals to suffer, they are not properly cared for, and there is an inability to replicate their natural habitats.
Attention getter: Work toward including, i.e., a shocking statistic, a quote, an anecdote, etc., that leads the audience into the material with more fire.
The information/research is well incorporated. However, it is not necessary to only offer a source. Remember, this is for you, the speaker. Therefore, each piece of information should be formatted to include the actual information.
It’s great that you have collected sources, but here, again, there is just a reference to the source rather than including the material chosen from that source.
Here, again, and to be clear, listing the source is not helpful for your process. Instead, choose the material from that source and include it.
Also, it’s probable that there would be approximately 1-2 sources for each point. Keep it simple.
The transitions are effective. The memorable close can mirror the attention-getter. If one begins with a quote, end with a quote. If one starts with a statistic, ends with a statistic, etc. This offers the audience a sense of closure.
Once you have actually incorporated the source content, you will be prepared to begin the next steps.
These include practicing with bullet-pointed notes. The goal is to achieve a sense of practiced spontaneity. It is not memorized. It is not read. There is a sweet spot in between that includes a sense that one is speaking with the audience naturally.
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